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| i've been to maryland and i've been to dover. i've seen the whole world two times over.
the 19th century was a grand century. the main reason for this is whaling. whale oil was a valuable commodity that nearly everyone used. it provided heat and light to millions of people in victorian england.
whaling is a man's sport. this is because in order to be successful you have to outsmart one of nature's smartest animals, the whale, and you also have to survive the sea.
the sea is a harsh mistress. it capsizes ships all the time like it ain't no thing. it doesn't care who you are, it will kill you. plus when you are out on the open waters, you face the constant threat of sea serpents.
sea serpents eat things, and they do it without sparing the violence. they eat anything that crosses their path, and usually they do it just for spite. sea serpents are bastards.
but the whales themselves prove to be the greatest challenge of all. the only weapon capable of defeating a whale is the harpoon. every whale ever brought back to shore was killed by harpoon, no matter what anyone tells you. just becareful that you don't get too near the whale's mouth as it will swallow you, and you will spend the rest of your life in a whale's belly. and this is not nearly as glamorous as the bible makes it out to be.
in conclusion, whaling is a difficult sport where death awaits you every moment from every angle all the time. but it provides citizens of the crown with precious whale oil. and sea serpents are bastards. | | |
| get a life, not a webpage
maybe kids don't have anything better to do, or maybe kids are just whiny, but it seems that everyone these days has some stupid webpage. most aren't as cool as this site, and the posts on these sites can be divided into a few categories.
summary of a day's events:
so today nothing much happened. i just drove around. then i went to the y to do something like play sports or something. then i came home and ate. then i slept on the couch while watching a rerun of gilmore girls. then i went out and ate at el. it was soooooo good. omg. then i came home and wrote this post because i actually think strangers take interest in the mundane events of an average kid.
addressing a grievance at one person, though not revealing their name:
omg i just had to vent this. this is not directed at everyone, just one person. this person knows who they are, even though i haven't left any clues whatsoever. i hate this person so much. they did something that probably wasn't that bad until it was taken out of context and blown out of proportion by the smugness and anonymity of high school gossip.
feeble attempt at poetry (often set in third person for some reason):
she looks at him and knows nothing will ever be the same. she wants to tell him to dance in the rain with her. he wants a sandwich.
song lyrics:
omg this song means so much to me and sums up exactly how i feel. even though i have such a deep connection to this song, i couldn't be bothered to write the lyrics myself. i just copied and pasted them. that's why there's words like 'chorus' and 'bridge' throughout.
Oh baby, baby
How was I supposed to know
That something wasn't right here
Oh baby, baby
I shouldn't have let you go
And now you're out of sight, yeah
Show me how want it to be
Tell me baby 'cause I need to know now, oh because
Chorus:
My loneliness is killing me
I must confess I still believe
When I'm not with you I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me baby one more time
Oh baby, baby
The reason I breathe is you
Boy you got me blinded
Oh pretty baby
There's nothing that I wouldn't do
It's not the way I planned it
Show me how you want it to be
Tell me baby 'cause I need to know now, oh because
Chorus:
My loneliness is killing me
I must confess I still believe
When I'm not with you I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me baby one more time
Oh baby, baby how was I supposed to know
Oh pretty baby, I shouldn't have let you go
I must confess, that my loneliness is killing me now
Don't you know I still believe
That you will be here
And give me a sign
Hit me baby one more time
Chorus:
My loneliness is killing me
I must confess I still believe
When I'm not with you I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me baby one more time
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| i'm a photoshop master
look at this magnificent picture i have created for everyone to enjoy. it features several items.
moose: a moose is a very large animal. males have huge horns they use to crush everything in their path. if a moose and a bear had a fight, the moose would win. if a moose and a shark had a fight, the shark would win. sorry moose, sharks are awesome.
general lee: it's dumb to name a car after a civil war general. cars should be named after girl's names. like that car christine, in that one movie. it had a taste for blood.
aliens: aliens are always like, 'look at us we have all kinds of lasers and we can destroy earth for no reason.' i don't know what it is, but aliens have pretty much consistently been jerks everytime they come to earth. except e.t. that little guy had a heart of gold and taught a generation how to love again. god bless e.t.
anthony mason: what is up with this kid?
nosferatu: vampires are awesome. especially nosferatu. he was like the first vampire to ever exist. he was a pioneer, and an inspiration to us all.
george foreman: george foreman was a boxer. he was always beating up people, for a living. it doesn't get any more american than that.
george foreman grill: even though george foreman has a busy life of punching people in the face, he still found time to invent a new type of grill. this is because he loves steaks, and he knows grilling things is awesome. | | |
| i ain't no holla back girl
this is the stupidest song ever. i mean this is god awful. there is no reason this song should even exist. it does, however, showcase the awesome songwriting ability of gwen stefani.
she chooses to start the song off by giving you a little background information. she lets you know that she's been around that track, not just once, but a few times. and contrary to popular belief it isn't just going to happen like that. then she puts to rest the common misconception, once and for all, that she is indeed a holla back girl.
this song also includes some other unbelievably creative lyrics that range from, 'this is my shit, this is my shit' to 'this shit is bananas. b-a-n-a-n-a-s.'
it's obvious that gwen stefani chose to ignore the fact that any second grader can spell bananas, and that it really doesn't take a genious to construct a four word sentence with 'shit' as the subject. i never really paid much attention in church, but i think this song may be one of the seven signs of the apocalypse.
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| i haven't posted in a long time.
here is a picture of hello kitty for everyone to enjoy. | | |
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